HOW TO CHOOSE A SPOUSE. [CONT’D] (#adamandeve series on Twitter with Pastor Bolaji Idowu)

Pastor Bolaji Idowu

Pastor Bolaji Idowu

1. Good evening, welcome to today’s Episode of #adamandeve. Kindly do remember to RT and Invite friends to follow the conversation.

2. Last week, we started discussion on “choosing a spouse” and that’s where we will continue today. This will be a good one.

3. Choosing who to marry is like, picking a channel on DSTV and you are not allowed to view other available channels

4. Wrong choice of spouse has led to heartbreaks, debt, sickness & even death. It’s wisdom to remain single than end up with the wrong person.

5. Some errors are easily corrected; unfortunately a wrong choice of spouse is so difficult to change as you have to live with it.

6. The key cause of divorce is heartbreak as a result of unmet expectations. Relationship/marriage could be fun, but it’s hell for many.

7. The foundation for successful relationships/marriages is choosing the right person

8. People are hard to change and they hardly change. When choosing a spouse, please remember this.

9. The right partner will cultivate you, the wrong one will destroy your potentials. So please choose RIGHT.

10. When you are hooked to a wrong partner, some of the attitudes gradually rob off you. You begin to act, think & behave like them

11. A broken relationship is better than a broken marriage. That said, so why do people make wrong decision in choosing a spouse?

12. Ignorance; this is another key reason why people make poor choices of a spouse.

13. Ignorance of what marriage entails, the sacrifices involved and the TRUE behaviour of the lover boy/girl.

14. Love and feelings have a way of excusing away unhealthy behaviours in a partner

15. Ironically, when couple breaks up, the feeling is intact mostly, but it is certain behaviours that cause unhappiness

16. I’m not a big fan, of short dating or courtship period, as discovering your TRUE partner is limited.

17. Please spend as much time knowing the person, background, friends and behaviour before saying YES.

18. Painfully, a lot of people get to marry and find out that, they are married to a total stranger, like a new person emerged.

19. It’s also true, that time is not just a factor in discovery [your part], but the others’ willingness to be open

20. The way some act in marriage, it’s very obvious they weren’t mentally prepared for it.

21. Choosing a life partner is one of biggest decisions you will ever make! Please do make it carefully.

22. Another reason for wrong choice of a partner is; SEX AND UNWANTED PREGNANCY

23. When a relationship gets really sexual, it beclouds the judgment of those in it. Sex time takes up talk & person discovery time

24. What happens most of the time is that one party becomes very attached to the sex at the detriment of other things.

25. Sex becomes the language of relationship. It becomes the way to apologize, reward or settle a fight. 26. So important issues that should be discussed or talked about and settled are shoved away with sex. 27. When a partner is angry, sex becomes a weapon/mode of settlement. When he/she demonstrates good behaviour, sex becomes a reward

28. The challenge is this; the issues aren’t resolved but swept under the influence of sex carpet.

29. Relationships work and thrive, when issues are discussed and resolved.

30. Unwanted pregnancy can complicate a relationship, as a party feels compelled to marry the other.

31. If it happens that pregnancy occurs but you are not sure of being married to that person, please slow down and get counsel.

32. In conclusion, pregnancy should not be the sole deciding factor in making a marriage decision.

33. That will be all for tonight, I do hope someone finds it helpful, Please do remember to retweet, comment and ask questions. #Adamandeve Extracted from Pastor Bolaji Idowu’s (@pastorbolaji) #adamandeve series on twitter and I think you should follow him. Info: #adamandeve series is live, every Thursday @ 5:30pm Nigerian time, on his TL (@pastorbolaji). Check here every Friday for fresh #adamandeve series. Thirsty for more? Click to visit the main Adamandeve archive :


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